Hugo Chavez - Or Why Clowns Don't Wear Them Noses Anymore!

For those who were still wondering whether Hugo Chavez, the president of Venezuela is a sound leader or a semi-illiterate fanatic, the answer was given yesterday on the floor at the General Assembly of the UN by none other than president Hugo himself. Chavez used 20 minutes of his speaking time to bash the US and the American President in a surprisingly childish way. But this should not come as a surprise to anyone, since Chavez, for the last 5 years has not missed one chance to make a fool out of himself, by making ridicules comments on current events.

He recently claimed that "the U.S. imperial power had planned and carried out the terrible terrorist attack of 9/11". For many years now legions of mentally feeble and ignorant have maintained that Carlos Gardel, the famous tango singer, never died in Medellin, that Elvis Presley is still alive, that the Americans never landed on the moon, that the Holocaust never happened and now that the US (together with the Israeli's) was behind the tragedy of 9/11!

It does not surprise me that some of his close friends on the international stage, like Ahmadinejad of Iran, Castro of Cuba and Kim-Il of North Korea share some of this sick crap with Chavez. What actually had surprised me a little bit is that this stuff comes from the president of a country, Venezuela, which receives some 70% of its income from petroleum sales to the US. It comes from the president of the country that aspires for a seat in the United Nations Security Council (UNSC), the place where world governments would presumably go in search of common sense and rationality.

If I think very hard, yes there might be one rational why president Hugo should stir the crap between the US and the rest of the world. The more tension there is out there, the higher the chances that the crude oil prices stay high. Chavez needs the high prices in the market since all of the oil resources of Venezuela are composed of what is known as "heavy oil"”. This kind of oil is the most expensive to extract. Therefore Venezuela is one of the first countries to suffer losses when the crude oil prices fall.

Then again, let'’s not forget that Chavez, a personal disciple of Castro, believes that it is his mission to continue the Bolivarian Revolution and to shake up what he perceives as the US dominated imperialist order. So there he goes around the world attaching himself to every moron that he can find, that shares his anti-Yankee sentiment, no matter how absurd an alliance between his country and for example the islamic Republic of Iran may be. Be aware, that anybody with a brain in Venezuela is trying to get a rid of this guy since years. That may explain why President Hugo trusts his own personal secuirty only to Cuban bodyguards and his secret police is run by Cuba.

And since he is not intellectual enough to come up with refined speeches, he uses what he knows best and that is demagogic peasant talk. Just like when he shouts at the illiterate and poor masses in Venezuela, selling himself as one of them, he now came to the UN and finally for once told the world the truth about Bush and the US. Just the way every peasant in the world wanted to hear it for a long time already. And since he sees no difference between himself and the likes of Khrushchev and Castro before him, he came not only to give a speech, but to make a historical mark. One that would not be easily forgotten. One that the world would still be talking about the next day.

And what a great job he did. The world and the UN for that matter got a good idea how it will be if Venezuela is granted its wish to become a permanent member of the UN. This institution that is currently fighting very hard not to become a total circus, certainly does not need the kind of disruption that Chavez will bring to the occasion. But just in case the future of the UN will be that of a circus, my recommendation is to hire president Hugo as their clown. He will fill the house, bring it down and make sure that everybody writes about it the next day. And not only will president Hugo single handedly redefine the UN but he will also change the world of the clowns for good. They will replace those red noses, with red shirts, red ties or red berets!